Tony Robbins, #Metoo & KaliPosted April 8, 2018 in Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine
You may have seen the viral video of self-help guru, Tony Robbins, recently helping “empower” a #metoo survivor by interrupting, minimizing and then physically pushing her in front of a crowd of thousands of people.
Activist and founder of the #metoo movement, Tarana Burke, addressed the issue via twitter stating: “I was made aware of this video BEFORE I ever saw it because Tony Robbins people reached out to do damage control within 24 hours. They wanted to “give me context” apparently. I don’t need any. I have eyes. The full video is 11 mins. And it’s gross.”
This has provoked an online discussion within the psychological community debating if the #metoo movement helps our society heal or keeps us stuck in regressive victim consciousness.
Since this PR nightmare, Tony has released an apology letter where he states he needs to “get connected to the brave women of #MeToo.”
Well Tony, I want to help you with that. May I introduce you to a very good friend of mine; she is like a sister from another mister (but is actually more like a goddess from another mother): Kali Ma.
Kali Ma, or Kali, for short, is a Hindu Goddess best known for creation and destruction, but I would say destruction is her main jam. She is black like the night, and also like the original void in which we were all created and to which we all must return. Her belly is a forever vortex, which can never be filled, while her womb pulses with the endless birthing of transformation. Her wild and primal gaze pierces anywhere we try to hide, destroying all of our defensive rationalizations and previously-held comforting beliefs. She only tolerates complete and absolute surrender to her fierce and holy power.
If you are one of the chosen, able to receive her terrifying gaze, her true gift is given–ultimate and radical transformation. She changes, on a dime, from the devouring mother to the birthing-goddess of the creatrix. She does not value death merely for death’s sake, but sees death as compost for new life.
This is how the Divine Feminine heals: death to the ego for holy transformation.
It is important to mention that I personally have received tremendous value from Tony Robbins’ work over the years. In high school, clutching an old composition book, I feverously took notes while devouring his audio tapes to learn about cognitive/positive psychology and Neuro-Linguistic Programming. His mastery on these topics are apparent, and I believe this is what, in part, started my desire to later go on to become a psychotherapist.
But positive psychology cannot save us now that we are in Kali’s grip. This is the moment where we, collectively (through #metoo, #timesup and the downfall of Harvey Weinstein culture), must become humble to Kali through her reckoning.
#Metoo is a movement born directly from Kali’s gaze. It is the painfully honest exposure of hidden lies, sickening injustice and unconscionable violence. America is in a stare-down with her fierce Feminine wisdom. It is up to all of us if we will turn fearfully away from her dark truth, or if we surrender to her cauldron of transformation. Then, and only then, can America be re-birthed. If we try to convince her otherwise (like Tony), pop pills to numb the discomfort, or simply turn away, we will miss her transmutation, which only comes from consciously sitting in the flames.
This is not a re-active, victim’s anger, this is a Sacred. Slow. Burn.
Painting by Penny Slinger
Yet, Tony and many Americans cannot discern between hysterical anger and Kali’s voice. To understand the difference, we must grasp the long and systemic history of power imbalance within the spiritual and psychological worlds. There has been a strong bias towards validating traditionally masculine Spirit work (bigger/better/more) while disregarding the Divinely Feminine work of the Soul (deeper, in and down). She is not the bright masculine light of inspiration, Icarus flying into the sun, (who has previously received all the awards, kudos and press)–She is the fierce Dark Goddess, who knows when to clip the wings before the inevitable burnout. She is the breakdown and the breakthrough. She is the voice of grounded, dark and holy transformation.
I speak about this tendency to favor masculine, spirit-based work over feminine Soul-based work (regardless of gender) all through my second book, Meet Your Soul. We must give room to let the Goddess do Her work. The Divine Feminine is unmoved by mental NLP techniques and the curation of empowered thoughts. Her hobby is cutting off heads! No, she is interested in eternal and holy truth, emerging from deep within the body. She takes no prisoners in her honest rage. We are no longer healed by egoic pump-ups; it is time to bow down. This humility is where the bridge will be built to cross the gender divide.
Kali wants you to surrender, she wants you to fall. She wants you to throw yourself into the ash-pile where your Soul has been waiting to meet you (#meetyou).
She is Holy in her darkness. She wants you to stop knowing. Stop trying. Stop talking. Just. Stop.
Tony’s point is that if we stay in anger, we are not free. This is an eternal and powerful spiritual message and I agree, Tony. I believe you have great intentions behind this sentiment.
Yet, the collective is ready for a rebirth. We will not find our new selves in an imbalanced, spirit-based, manically-positive version of self-help. The Divine Feminine is trying to heal us in this historical moment. Kali has set America on fire and those who are transformed will be because they had the courage to stay and feel the flames.
When the Dark Goddess appears, you do not create the syllabus or the timeline. You do not power-trip, judge the journey, and you definitely don’t tell Kali when she is done. She is here. It is time to get humble and listen. Kali tells you when she is done. And listen up Tony, She ain’t done yet.
Image by Android Jones Art
Check out my other blog on the Divine Feminine and Sacred Masculine here.
and my husband, Adam’s, take is here.